Diving in Aceh

Nerf: "Chow is how serious about his job! Go all the way to Aceh to report on the hardships, the humanitarian situation - gritty real-life reporter style leh!"

Chow: "Actually, I went Aceh for the diving hahahaha..."

Nerf: "..."

The aforementioned conversation took place a month back, at an Old Chang Kee stall outside of Far East Plaza. It appeared to be a seemingly innocuous revelation. Or was it? As a team of elite shit-stirrers, the C6 team's keen instinct for gossip is beyond compare. Consider the following...

Aceh - A hotbed of poverty and corruption following various accounts of rescue funds disappearing 'mysteriously' whilst under the jurisdiction of the Indonesian military.

Aceh - Home to thousands of poor, homeless and nubile young girls, many of whom lost their kin and kith during (and in the aftermath of) the tsunami.

Aceh - A nymphomaniac's dream come true?

Bearing this in mind, Team C6 cast its feelers out far and wide. Given the meticulous sweep of Central 6's resources, it was only a matter of time before we uncovered this incriminating photo of Chow's Acehnese muffdiving trip:




Oh. My. God. Say it with me - OHMYGOD.

For the blur cocks who don't quite see it:




Given the above evidence, Central 6 thus concludes that there clearly exists more than one way to enjoy the sport of 'diving'. Maybe Chow needed to get rid of some 'dive weight' residing in his lower body? Maybe the girl was hungry for Chow's 'Sea Cucumber'? Who knows? Either way, it's now clear that when it comes to Chow, there's always more to it than meets the eye... And so now we all know that, whenever Destiny's Chow asks you if you wanna join him on a diving trip, you'd better be careful, 'cuz...

KTV LIAISONS of an ARTY OFFICER

IF you enjoyed the National Day Parade (NDP) recently, you might not have known the musical-like national day celebrations was planned as early as last year. And who else but our lovely CPT Cenneth Joel Phua, -whom you might have recalled as Mr Ang Mo Kio- was the person behind it.

It must be poignant for you, -all the foreign workers, talents, citizens and permanent residents alike- at the 20:22 moment, you placed your right hand across your left tit and renewed your vow that you will never ever quit as a quitter. Honestly, was it as good for you as for me?

Seriously. for me. it was a waste of my time and taxpayers' money. It clearly demonstrated what the NDP planners will resort to do to improve its viewership. Besides hoarding the CH 5,8 , and CNA. They even took Vasantham and Suria. Not only that, by arranging a massive onslaught to our senses, by launching a massive awareness (for a lack of better word) campaign through all forms of media. Does it make you more patriotic or idiotic? I seriously think that this is a waste of our taxpayers' money!

Therefore, in an attempt to uncover what do we pay army officers to do, Central6 underwent a month long undercover job to disclose where did you, the taxpayer, pay your income tax to, and in the spirit of public disclosure, Central6 have uncovered: KTV LIAISONS of an ARTY OFFICER.

n a month long sting operation, we were following Mr AMK around, on his entertainment expenses trip. Yes, as the title suggested, KTV or to the uninitiated, Karaoke Lounges.

When asked why he likes to visit these places so much, Mr AMK quipped: "It has always been the usual practice, to have a few sessions after the year long planning of the nation's celebrations."

"If I dun spend, where will they have money to pay income tax? Where I get my pay?" said Mr AMK.

Hence, the time finally came when we managed to find the empirical evidence to show you where your money is being spent. SINGING LESSONS.


Here, just take a look, Mr Phua or should I say Captain AMK with an unidentified friend humming to the tune, Girls not Grey at the KTV. Despite being tone deaf, Mr Phua still insists that he is a good singer.

"That is how the girls want to touch my bulge ok? I serenade them," he revealed. "You think one bottle of bombay sapphire gin enough meh? Need fingers also ok! They call me the Second Hand Serenade, I sing and I use my hands. Hur Hur," he chuckled. If you have missed the report of the Wong bastards chalet, pls read previous post.

Well, for all you folks out there, the judgment is ultimately up to you. Central6 is just here to report.

This reporter also found out that besides the innocent singing services, Mr AMK is apparently a high roller. He spent so much that he has to spoon, We mean be spoon-fed, sugar syrup so as to make his vodka go down smoother. Nuff said, evidence is as below.

Hmmm... I am so going to Swensons.

Meanwhile, do stay tune for more updates as our covet actions reporter bring you more updates.

Exploiting Unemployment: Part I

My dear Reader! Why, hello there! My, hasn't it been a looooong time!

In a painfully obvious fashion, its been quite awhile since anything was posted on this journal. Is anyone even reading this? Do tell - it'd be good to hear from someone (... anyone?), seeing as to how I've still plenty to post...

Wait. What's that, you say? Plenty to... That's right, ladies and gentlemen. You're absolutely right. Just when you all but closed the coffin door on Central 6, here cometh thy proclamation - I've still plenty to post. The thing is, Central 6 incurred a significant backlog of gossip whilst the four of us (plus the numerous honorary members-cum-smokers who used to plague Central Library and the Old Canteen) went about raising hell. What happened to all that trash - the stories, the videos, the memories? Lost, that's what; lost whilst we were busy saving trashy tales as leverage for a rainy day; lost whilst we schemed and plotted to mass-produce items of universal gossip, to be disseminated amongst ourselves for lifelong storage and reminiscence; lost, as with all good things in life that are ever transient.

But fear not, for Cheok's IBM HDD (that nears extinction even as I write this, buzzing like a turbine on crack) does not lie. All these years I've stored the data files for the first and second Wong Bastard (supposedly) Annual Chalets, waiting for the opportunity and budget to manufacture copies for all who attended. Unsurprisingly, the masters of procrastination who encompassed Central 6's membership never did commit to the task, and so for the past 4 years I've had a derelict folder on D: drive that's collecting cobwebs.

Till now. Naturally, I'm assuming that since none of the original members (save, perhaps, Chow and Nerfy on the occasional whim) visit this blog, I've implicit clearance to air stuff that probably would have met with considerable resistance 3-4 years back. And, you know lah, fuckit man - also good to put things up somewhere, rather than have my goddamn HDD crash on me and that's-it gone-case gee-gee.

So, without further ado, and for my own benefit if no-one reads this stuff anymore - leaked material from the past. I'll put it up over time, piecemeal; maybe, given the period of post-graduation unemployment that I'm now in, I'll be motivated to reassemble C6 for some fresh dirt production... You never know, baby!



School project that Chalk did. Naturally, he was handpicked for the job; equally naturally, he never wanted this published online. hur.



Dr. Don's dabble at Pageant fame. Obviously picked up some pointers from Mr. Ang Mo Kio on stage poses. My good (maybe not so good after he sees this) friend of eleven-or-so years, hopes eventually to be a pediatrician. Print this out for free checkups - for life! Please don't let him discover I put this up.



Bedroom scene from the 1st Wong Bastard's Chalet - and also the crime scene for one of Nerfy's most blemished scandals. See Chalk? Mr Ang Mo Kio is behind him. Behind Nerf? See the rise of the the chest? That's no male specimen, my friends... Legs on legs, hot rubbing action, hands down the pants, ho ho ho Mister Phua!

This was, incidentally, not an anyhow-shit-stir story. This one, true one ah. You see his pants, bulge suspiciously at a certain area? You see her grinning teeth reflected off the camera flash? Ho ho ho.




Phua, SECOND Wong Bastard's Chalet. I don't think I need to say much more about this one... He obviously got her drunk with that bottle of Bombay Sapphire. Ho ho ho x 2


Again, it makes you wonder - all that BS we incorporated into this blog... Just how much of it was true?

Well, that's all for now! God damnit, I thought there were more... spicy... files, somewhere. Wasn't there one of Chalk frenching someone else's girlfri... Mmmmmm. Lemme go look around. Till next time, dear Reader!

P.S.: Incidentally, if you look carefully, the girl in the last photo - the one with the blue shirt - appears in the 2nd last photograph as well. That's right, in the bed adjacent to Kenneth's. Guess who's groin she's got her hands on? A-ha... Ho ho ho.